So my friend and I have been together for several months now. We get along really well and we have regular sex too. However, when I ask him if we want to do something together he always says I have no idea or I don't care and when I make a suggestion he says I don't feel like it, etc. I always ask him what we can do instead and he always says we can't watching Netflix and ordering food? (we do that every time we see each other) but I don't feel like it anymore. He could sit in front of the telly every day and do nothing. What I also noticed is that he has zero zest for life. When he comes to me he doesn't really smile, is always tired and not really talkative. I asked him if he was still happy with me and he said I'm the reason why he starts smiling every morning. It sounds cute but I don't really believe it. My parents and friends also noticed that he has no joie de vivre and how a ghost is now coming across to everyone. He doesn't have to be crazy or anything, I don't want him to change, but that he comes to me so unhappy makes me think. I've already asked him if there's anything with him, maybe with his friends, school or family. He thinks it's all good with him, it just turned out to be his way of not being so cheerful. And that really annoys me. I also asked him if it was the sex or if he might have someone new that interests him more. He just said again that I'm talking nonsense and that everything is really good. But he wasn't like that before! At the beginning he was a cheerful person who always wanted to do something and had fun in life. He has often met with his friends and has experienced many things. Sometimes I even suggest he go out with his friends and when he comes back I have already cooked something and we can watch Netflix together. He doesn't feel like it either and then just goes to sleep.
I just do not know how to go on. Has anyone ever had such an experience? Can I maybe bring this "joy" back to him?
Thanks in advance for reading and for the answers.
Only later do people show who they really are, it's always like that
Yeah
So it's best to sit down with him and ask him if he has any problems or if he just wants to do what he wants then I would just say if things continue like this your relationship makes no sense if it's always the same is
Until the first half I still thought "hmm that could be me". Why smile for no reason, you are not insane. Joy of life is also bad in this world full of pigs, so I guessed Weltschmerz. I'm like that, Netflix and food is enough, smiling is obsolete (PB is an exception).
But that you are so attentive and accommodating should actually please him.
From the way it sounds overall, he's in depression.
Has achieved everything and now no longer a plan in life.
This is what your marriage looks like. Tell him you don't feel like getting married to Netflix. If he doesn't spurt then you have to make a decision anyway
