Example: A colleague writes to me and would like to watch an action film "online Netflix, in other words, we're starting the same film at the same time and conversing on discord" as if you were sitting next to each other just online
I say everything is clear give me 5min. I take the time for him although I might want to do something but it always works for him because he is my best colleague and it goes without saying that you take your time.
I got him a few days later. Want to watch a film? And he always. Hmm yes, let's have a look, wanted to gamble with someone later, look this already. Then usually the following day he will contact you again if we want to watch something.
I do not get it.
Hmm, you have your views, some of which I share, but you don't always "HAVE" to have time for your best friend. Your friend certainly doesn't mean it badly and has a different point of view than you. Bring it up. But now I wouldn't want to urge a friend to do something with me either, but I would talk about why he never has time or just wants to spend time with me.
Of course, you don't have to exaggerate. Wanting to watch a film every day is then an exaggeration. Just choose an evening and make an appointment haha. I'm not spontaneous either and would rather prefer such an arrangement.
Then let him wait and don't put your needs behind his
I do not see the problem.
The fact that you take the time for him shows for me that you put him above you, which in my eyes is not healthy for a friendship.
And that he cancels if he has no time or no desire to do something is completely normal. Then he comes back to the question the next day?
But it is correct to spend time or not that has nothing to do with me putting him above me, I just ask someone who gives me the same in return. I don't want to change and then let him wait, that's not me. But what he does sucks
